Diseased
by NiceFwoops
Summary: Walburga did not blast her brother's name off the family tapestry. She pressed her wand to her brother's smiling face and held it there, watching with hard eyes as it slowly burned a hole right down to the wall, until the only remains of him were a few wisps of scorched thread.


Written for the quidditch league fanfiction comp, my prompt was walburga black. im keeper for the falcons. warnings for, um, gay alphard? hope you like it!

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Walburga did not blast her brother's name off the family tapestry. She pressed her wand to her brother's smiling face and held it there, watching with hard eyes as it slowly burned a hole right down to the wall, until the only remains of him were a few wisps of scorched thread.

She did not cry. Her brother was dead. He would never know that his sister hated him.

_"Play with me, Wally, please?"_

_"Those are boy games, and I'm not a boy."_

_"They won't be boy games if you play them with me."_

_The look in Al's eyes, so hopeful and trusting, always got to her, and she smoothed down her heavy velvet skirt as she sat on the dusty attic floor to play tin soldiers with her little brother._

She could not cry. Alphard had been gone from her life for a long time. The little boy she'd cared about had gone, gone with the little girl who was willing to play soldier. She did not have time for this sentiment. For this emotion.

Why didn't she? Why didn't she have the time? After all, she had one less son to care about, gone in a whirlwind of disobedience. She felt anger stir within her, and glared with satisfaction at the scorch mark below her name.

_"You're too harsh on him, sister."_

_She turned her nose up at her brother. He was so foolish, sitting on the bannister and swinging his legs like a child. His easy grin irritated her. So did his good looks and his good cheer and his general happiness._

_"He is my heir," she replied sharply. "Sirius will be head of the family one day. He must be prepared."_

_"Surely you know by now that if you try to bend a stick, it will break," said Alphard. "Funny thing is, as far as I can tell, that works for kids too."_

Was that how it had been with Alphard? Had they broken him in their vain attempts to tame him? Had she and her parents pushed too hard, been too cruel?

No, she hadn't been cruel. She had only done what she'd had to. There was no cruelty in being honest.

_"Why do you have to be so mean?"_

_Alphard's eyes were too young for his adolescent body. He tugged at his high collar and pouted at the floor, realizing how whiny he had sounded. Walburga's arms were crossed and her lips pursed._

_"I'm not mean," she said. "Only honest."_

_"I can't help the way I act!" said Alphard earnestly. "I wish I could be manly like Father, I do, but no matter what I try, I always go back to being a girly...I always end back up being..."_

_"Queer," finished Walburga harshly. "You'd better be glad I'm here to carry on the Black name, because we both know it won't be you."_

_She almost felt bad when she saw her brother's face._

That had to be where it started, she thought as she stared at the elegant and ancient artwork, eyes roving the patterns in some desperate attempt for solace.

It had started when her brother hit puberty, and he began to drift away from her, into a secret life that no one would talk about in polite company. Alphard did not even discuss it with his beloved sister, and their father never addressed it.

Never addressed it, but ignored it. He had ignored her brother in the end, giving him money enough to buy an apartment when he graduated from Hogwarts and kicked him out of the house. And his gaze turned to Walburga.

"It's all your fault," she heard herself whisper as her eyes returned to the newest charred mark. "All of it."

_"I'm sorry, Wally," said Alphard, looking genuinely distressed as Walburga sat across from him on a suspiciously comfortable armchair. "I can't believe Father would marry you off like that."_

_"I can," said Walburga bitterly, her face hard as she resolved not to cry. "There are worse matches, I suppose. At least I already know him."_

_"Yes, you do," said Alphard, throwing up his hands in frustration. "You know him to be paranoid and distrustful, a braggart and a brawler, same as I do! Don't pretend otherwise, sister."_

_"Father pointed out that I do not have the most agreeable of dispositions."_

_"Bugger Father," cried Alphard in response._

_Walburga found it rather ironic._

She had never wanted Orion. Alphard was right, and he refused to let her live with her delusions of happiness, with the hope their marriage could be a pleasant one. Alphard had poisoned it for her. Alphard was crueler than Pollux, crueler than even she was, disguising his venom under concern and kind words.

And when Sirius, her Sirius, the boy she had nurtured from infancy, began to rebel, Alphard did not stop him. Alphard encouraged him, cared for him, gave him warmth and love where Walburga could only find bitterness. Sirius was the spiteful child of a hateful marriage. When she looked at him it was all she could see. But not Alphard. Alphard found something to love where she could not.

_"You are dying," repeated Walburga, unable to process the very concept. "Dying."_

_Alphard was smiling as he always did, but his gaze was sad. "Yes, sister. I am glad to know you haven't lost your hearing."_

_Walburga was shocked. Blacks did not come down with diseases. Blacks did not die of sickness. Blacks clung to life with every ounce of their strength._

_Except, it seemed, Alphard, whose face was already drawn and pinched from the toll of his illness. Walburga should not have been surprised. Alphard had never been a normal Black._

_"We have had our rough patches, sister," said Alphard then, smoothing back hair that was still thick and black. "But know that I love you."_

_As he left, Walburga could not help but hate him for the tears brought to her eyes._

He had said he loved her, but he betrayed her even as he wrote his will, dated the day before they last spoke. Alphard knew what he was doing. He granted freedom to a rebellious teenager right under her nose, without even talking to her. He had not even taken the time to let her know.

Alphard had been hers once, before Sirius. Before duties and marriages, before men had entered their lives. Alphard had been hers, and life had stolen him.

She gripped her wand so tightly that it cracked as she hoped that Sirius, who, like Alphard, had never been a normal Black, went the same way.

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reviews are appreciated


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